May 10 2010

10/05/10

do I have a problem.

So after last year, I am a little paranoid I think. It doesn’t help when you’ve had big problems, and lost fish, that when you notice the slightest little thing that is off, you want to fix it.

So over the winter, after getting rid of Flukes. My koi settled to a nice winter period, no problems.

Now I’m a little concerned as the weather is warming up and it seems my pond is a little ummm ‘dead’

I had blanket weed growing in abundance two months ago, in the snow covered world of my pond. Now the bottom is brown, dead, and mucky.

I’m thinking because I’ve spent a couple of days trying to get rid of the slick. And having dredged up a bit of crap, that my beautiful black and white fish, nicknamed ‘pinky’ is ringing true to her name. She was pink last night and decidedly pinker this morning. Stress from crappy water conditions I am sure. Hopefully it will go and it is nothing too deadly to flap over.

But I can’t help but flap. I’ve tried to get my local guy out to come take a look, and he’s so snowed under it doesn’t seem to be happening. Never enough time in the day. I get this.

So this year, I really am going to have to get to learn how to do this stuff myself, and buy some better equipment. Enough said.

Just venting a little really guys.

Will keep you up to date, and I do have some great pics. My sturgeon are massive now. :) I’m so proud.

——————————–

LATER

Happy to know, no bugs. :)

now I can relax and have a little piece of mind at least there’s nothing major. Just have to improve their water quality.

Off to watch them.

————————————–

EVEN LATER

Yeah, was a little paranoid about it. And to some yeah wasted money. But they’re my fishies, and I can’t help but love em. Glad there is nothing in there at all. Probably will take a few days for ‘pinky’ to go white again, he really really didn’t like being caught, went even redder almost instantly. Never seen a fish do that before. Just pop and red vessels started showing all over. Barry said it happens with these fish, but just was so weird to see it.

Least I know, least I’m settled… best bit of cash to spend. Now to save for a microscope and learn to do it myself I think. :)

Warm summer, cold beers, sounds awesome…

D

By kanundra • Posted in Koi
0
Apr 26 2010

26/04/10

The Secret King (script)
So I have a few questions really before I undertake a serious re-write for my pilot.A few pointers have been made. That the first hour should be longer, so what I was thinking of doing was just stretching it a little. But I have to think about the rest that is already written. I’ve already taken the 2 hours and made it into 4, so if those four hours become any longer then it’s going to be about 6-8 for the first lot. Which was a bit more than I had intended, considering where Steve and I have already written the rest of the episodes from.

I don’t mind doing this because I love this series, although I am wondering what to aim for.

I get that it should possible be around 100 pages for the pilot.

I’ve read many different TV scripts pilots for series.

There is

V at 61 pages
Taken 102 pages
Being Human 60 pages
Battlestar Gallatica 97 pages
Flash Forward 61

So I am thinking I am right in setting up the pilot first hour at 60 pages although it wouldn’t be any hardship for me to take the 2nd half also at 60 pages, and make it 100. The act break happens to fall at 101, so umm I could have it all set up very differently. I am just thinking that each network is so different, and that at least i I do have it set for the hour show, it would be right for both.

I don’t know just thinking out loud here.

Anyone else have any thoughts. What should I aim for and set it out like?

Thoughts much appreciated.

Dawn

Jan 11 2010

11/01/10

Okay so here is my day…

I had a good day yesterday, I met a new lady who I became friends with a writer, she read some of my work and loved it, so it gave me a boost of happiness for the day. My shift at work was busier than on Sat night, with all the bad weather in the uk, no one is going out and so the sale of petrol also has slowed down a lot.

However, I still couldn’t sleep.

I am having awful thoughts again, and I know its due to food issues. I ate okish yesterday. A sandwhich at lunch and dinner, and then I had some soup in work later on. But my body is still hungry and Im restricting with the hope of losing weight, its working yeah. As with all strict regimes the weight drops off. What worries me the most, is am I going to be able to stop with the restrictions. Or is anorexia going to strike while the iron is hot? I am hoping not. I am hoping I can do this in a good way.

Inside me, I am seriously doubting my decisions right now.

So over the Christmas period, I put on 7lb. It hurts like hell. There is nothing that can describe the already horrific feelings inside me, and then knowing that, made me feel so so much worse.

I am really trying to rationalise my thoughts, in telling myself that everyone puts weight on over xmas, but its not working.

I cleared all my cupboards out over the last weekend, and have had to endure the worst shopping expedition ever.

Not only has everyone in this country gone mad, but I had to stand in Asda today and burst into tears over walking down the isles.

Panic buying is something this country only sees every so often, yet I went shopping to find the shelves pretty damned empty and I myself then thought HOLY CRAP I have nothing at home, as we whittle everything down over the holidays, and there is NO food in the stores.

Hence why in one shop alone I spent £125 and then went on to asda and followed it with £156 I know my cupboards are bursting. Yet in all honesty all I want to do is throw it all away.

How can life be so darned complicated.

At least I can sleep easy, knowing at least I have enough food for the cat!!!

Anyway, I called to see one of my work collegues on the way home. He and his girlfriend have just had their first baby, a little girl. Who was really cute. David, seems to be doing good, even though he’s been let down by out management in regards to holiday pay and maternity leave. Typical aint it, when you need the money the most your boss screws you over…

We have had a little whip around for him though, and I am hoping to pick him up a fridge…

So I am totally exhausted today, I drank one cup of tea and had a sausage roll. All I want to do is curl up and go to sleep, but of course, hubby is due home and I should be cooking… Why do I just want to disappear….

I’ll update soon, hopefully when I begin to feel a little better. I had hoped that the new year would bring with it a fresh start, but the only thing wanting a fresh start is the anorexia.

I will do my best to fight off those awful voices.

Dawn

Dec 23 2009

23/12/09

can’t imagine a life without you,

you rule my head, filling me with dread.

I can’t imagine why you hurt me so,

that inner pain won’t ever go.

I’ve fought you long, I’ve fought you hard,

but the damned tiniest crack,

and your back.

My head hurts, my heart aches.

The pain I cause myself so bad, that all I feel is sad.

To want this year to end, to blend with all the others.

To start the next afresh, and not inside this terrible flesh.

 

 

By kanundra • Posted in poem
0
Dec 21 2009

21/12/09

So non of my friends are about to chat, so I thought I would pop in here.

I have had a good day in work, just got in about 30 mins ago, the weather is horrible, I was sliding all over on the road in my car. I am so so glad we don’t have to use the motorbike in this weather, I remember what it used to be like going to work on my 125, oh no never again. Far too cold and dangerous.

Anyway, it was pretty un eventful really. I did my job tried to do the best I could and then when the night man came in to releave me I came home.

I have a few days off now, but I might pop up to one of our other petrol stations tomorrow. They are having a mock robbery, how cool is that. I am going to try and get some on my phone, when we have one at our site, I really want to get the film crew down and make some sort of little documentary about it, that would be great. Something else on my belt..

Its got to all help.

I just wonder what it would be like to be in a real one. I know we are all trained to handle things like that, and to keep our cash limits down in the tills but at this time of year, if someone thinks they can get £10 for nothing, they will try anything, especially if desperate.

So I might blog tomorrow about what happens, Think it will interest a few people and myself for future reference lol.

Hope all is well with everyone else. I am going to go to bed soon. Its been a long day, I am cold and my pillow is calling my name….

lol

Speak soon, good night all.

Dawn