Saying Goodbye

Today is a day where we get to say goodbye to a very close old family friend. Ronnie Docker.

It is not going to be a good day.

It will be, however, a day of reflection and one of many assaults on all my senses.

This year has been one of the worst for a few reasons. This being one of them. I don’t deal with death, or dying very well at all. It’s something I can’t see. Like literally I can’t see.

It might seem cold, and it isn’t. I just can’t deal with it. When my nan died on my dad’s side. She’d been very ill for a long time. I loved going to see them. But, the more she deteriorated, the more I couldn’t cope, in her last few weeks. Both Paul and my dad tried to get me to visit but I couldn’t.

Anorexia and depression already had me in it’s horrible grips as I was awaiting my call to go to Cheadle Royal hospital.

It was at her funeral that the beast took hold completely and over the next few months I lost around more weight than I should have. That day took me back to my earlier years you see, when my grandad died, to where I was being bullied at school left right and centre.

I don’t ever pertain to understand the complex way my mind works. Or in the how I deal with things. I don’t deal with some things very well at all, and that voice in my head just takes over instead. It is what it is. A coping mechanism for feeling.

I am where I am today because of those people and the ED that made me internalise all the things
hateful things anyone ever said.

Today, I am going to allow myself to feel. I am going to say goodbye to a gentleman who brought many things to my life. From your cantankerous old ways to the laughter and fun.

I know who I am, I will remember where I have come from, I will not go backwards, I will be okay.

Ron, where ever you are, be happy. We will miss you lots and lots.

~ Dawn

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I’m so excited :)

Hey all – it has been a busy week.

One thing I have found in plotting over the last week is no matter how well you know your story. That sometimes the characters can surprise you.

Book 3 has really had me stumped for some time. The end goal and Kendro’s Death being one of the damned hardest things to get through ever, because I’ve known it and it’s been written in the TV series for many years and something which was hard then.

Leading through Book 1 and 2 Kendro totally stole my heart. I don’t and never want to kill anyone, but when you go through and live and learn with your characters through a few hundred thousand words, getting to that point is bad.

The fact that he tries so hard to avoid all conflict leading to his demise is noble, but the outcome still the same. Just in a very different way. I lose him.

Today, I built up the chapters leading to this. The ultimate battle between worlds. The situation is dire, there is nothing anyone else can do. And it’s been an awesome day!

Nano isn’t for everyone. I totally understand that. The fact that you’ve to hit targets some people can’t deal with, but I find it liberating. The support from other writers around the world is amazing, and with camp you can set your own goals… even better.

So, roll on April the 1st! I’m all set to go! and totally excited for it… how is your WIP treating you? are you taking part in camp nano?

Hotting up!

And I don’t mean the weather. Well we’re almost ready for the final stages of TSK’s book 1 release. I’m really excited that everything is coming together, and then I’m really scared as well. I flit from one to the other almost every minute. our website can be found here –

http://www.thesecretking.com/

Here’s a scary image for you, the day I received the Royal Pendant from Trent in the US. I love it so much, I can’t wait to see if we can get a few of these manufactured. (this one is hand crafted out of wood, with such love it is unreal!

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The cover is looking SUPER awesome. And I’ll do a big cover reveal over the easter bank holiday I think.

Sci fi Max’s latest edition is set for release on Friday! which has a great page spread for us. Please check it out, and of course, I’ll remind you all on the day… https://www.facebook.com/scifimax?fref=ts

I’ve been spending the weekend planning. Camp Nano starts in April, I have two weeks of 4 working week days, and then a whole two weeks off. I plan to hammer out the third book to the series. Looking to get around the 100k mark, but we’ll see. Its early yet, and I’m not 100% where the story and characters will take me. The planning is and always does take a different path when I’m in the midst of it all.

So there you are! I’m super excited. I totally can’t wait for April….

Dawn

Progress

It’s been a little while since I’ve posted so I’m here, I think 3 weeks in with meds though, so I’ve been trying to get used to all that and in getting myself feeling better.

The AD’s kicked my butt at first, not only when I take them do they make me sleepy, (which was kinda the point) but I also couldn’t stop eating. It’s really like I’ve no control over it, and that was very hard to deal with at first.

I kept up with the training though and even though I ate loads I tried not to freak out. The second week was easier, I took cereal snacks into work, and munched on those instead, and this week I seem to be much more able to control what I’m doing. And the training is increasing. 140 heart rate tonight and 11 mins 🙂 so increasing 1 min a day. I can do this!

Everything for TSK is going well. The cover design is looking amazing…. and we kinda decided on the end of April as a tentative release date. 🙂 So we’re storming to that as a goal. Fingers crossed everyone.

Will try and post as soon as I get anymore news.

Dawn