Friday, broken wing and editing :)

Hey guys/gals 

 

I’ve been having a tough few weeks that’s for sure, but some things are improving. Getting slight better movement in my arm. Still taking pain killers and they kind of numb the head, but it’s been 3 full weeks now since the incident. I do feel like I’m improving now. So hopeful 🙂

Anyway, I wanted to let you in on my novel’s first page. 

Over the last few months, I’ve been working very, very hard with EJ Runyon. She’s been so valuable as a coach and editor. I’ve found prose writing totally different than scripts. Where a script is so terse prose is enriched and alive. I’ve had a brilliant few months, it’s been one heck of a learning experience. And EJ will be my coach/editor for a long time. When you find someone who is good, you don’t let them go. Her way of explaining things is spot on, I’ve never had that, from English Teachers or professional I’ve wanted to hire before. (I know I’m not the easiest client, I’ve bad habits like the best of of us, but I’m trying…) 

Her blog is at – http://ejrunyon.wordpress.com/2013/06/24/structuring-sentences-to-use-more-showing/

and her coaching website is over at -http://bridgetostory.com

 

Please contact her if you’ve ever considered editing or coaching, as an author you’ll not regret it. : ) promise. 

 

And here is the first page of my novel. Un-edited. And edited, (but not final) still needs proofing and checking 100%. 

I wanted you to all see the difference a few months makes. The writing journey. This has had a good few crits over at the OWWSFF. website address is – http://sff.onlinewritingworkshop.com/index.shtml

My story attracted an Editors Choice review (middle edit) which was wonderful. And gave me total hope for the series. The reviews there really helped shape the story too.

Then I had the honour of winning a years membership over at http://www.scribophile.com which again has been one of the best sites I’ve ever come across. And helped take my novel to the next level. I also met a fantastic writer who has helped me to know end. I have no doubts I’ll be promoting his book here one day soon too. 🙂 so watch this space. 

So here it is… 

The Secret King – The Beginning 

 

From this….. 

 

Kendro eased himself into his favorite chair. It creaked just as it always did and he wished he could take it with him. His office, empty, didn’t resemble home anymore. Sadness washed over him. It was over and they had to leave everything but their prized possessions behind.

   The handmade wooden desk before him had been in his family for generations and he ran his hand along its surface until he found a tiny dent. He frowned and remembered the day he’d made that hole. The day Admiral Broki confirmed the fate of their Sun and he’d dropped a hot steaming mug of tea over everything. Now apart from the desk and set of chairs nothing else cluttered the room. All his belongings had been moved to the mother- ship. The furniture here deemed unimportant. Although why he’d deemed it unimportant shook him. These objects were a part of his history.

Resting his head in his arms, he closed his eyes just for a brief moment of thought. Were they going to survive the incredible journey ahead?

To this – 

CHAPTER ONE – Evacuation

Kendro moved nearer his office window, once again watching their dying sun, setting for the night. Too tired even to think — three days too tired. Rubbing his eyes, he stroked down the sides of his temple, a blue tingle of energy from his fingers lit his royal birthmark in a glorious rainbow of colours.

Three tiers up in the royal palace, he glanced down at the view below him, just making out the soldiers as they loaded his belongings onto shuttles in the growing twilight. The sight added a depression that weighted his soul. He turned, regarding his empty office, stripped of everything but the desk and its chair. Best to do what work I can before they come for these too.

Work didn’t come for him. He stared at the portable screen, blank. “You think you’ve won.” with a headshake, wiping away tears with the back of his hand, Kendro flung his keyboard into a corner where it shattered. “Never!”

Resting his head, Kendro rested for a brief moment. His breathing slowed, he shook himself awake. For almost three days now; with barely any sleep since he ordered the evacuation; within every tightening muscle and sinew, Kendro felt the strain.

“Kendro?”

His attention turned to his wife, Mika. Her face sparkled as she stepped lightly over the wreckage of the smashed keyboard reaching his side; a look of anxiety quickened her stride.

 

———————–

 

Different, yes, better. I totally believe so 🙂 

 

So, if you’re looking for someone to help push you that bit further, check out all of the above 🙂 You will not be disappointed. 

 

Dawn x 

Week 3 of broken Elbow

I can say the pain is a tad bit easier. Although it’s pretty sore first thing in the morning and worst at night. 

Lying awake staring at the ceiling listening to traffic go past isn’t much fun. 

But I am getting more movement in my wrist. Not too sure if there was initial damage there. Something I’ll have to ask the fracture clinic, as I’ve noticed more and more pain in my lower wrist where it struck the floor. Turning my arm upwards is pretty much still impossible. I get this cracking pop and it hurts, so I’m only doing so many in the day. 

For me, personal things are the worst. Still can’t put on underware. I’m in hubby’s T-shirts as they’re easier to get on, and bathing… sheesh not a chance. Can get in the bath, but not out. I’m like a decrepid old woman. And I feel it too. 

I don’t mind showers, but when you’re feeling crappy it’s nice to have a bath. Not at present. 

 

I’m finding it difficult in the ‘hobby’ side of things too. Not being able to write/edit as much as I’d like has to be a writers worst nightmare. Normally if I can’t write, I do something else creative. But my ‘other’ hobbies are out the window too. 

Normally I can cross stitch for hours, and have been putting some things for a charity I support. 

http://www.parrot-rescue.org.uk/portalid/0/Home/tabid/36/Default.aspx

 

Here are a couple of pictures of my stitching for them. In the hopes it will help raise funds to keep unwanted/abused birds in the veterinary treatment they need. 

 

Image

 

Unfinished but hope it will make a nice pin cushion 🙂 When I can stitch again. 

 

Just frustrating when you can’t do anything !! 

 

Uggghhh, here’s my lil Bobby though, he’s been great company while I’ve been home. Getting cheekier by the day though. At present I’m trying to get him used to being touched. Sometimes I get to feel his tail and place my finger on his back, but he’s not keen and flies away. I am starting to be able to get near his beak without him biting. Although this morning proved he still has the upper hand when instead of going for the treat, he bit my finger instead, sometimes cranky when he first wakes up. 

 

Image

 

His ‘Black Ring’ is showing really well now. He’s a beautiful boy, and he defo knows it too. 🙂 

 

This has taken me all morning to put together, so I’d better wrap it up. 

I’ve been plotting for Nanowrimo. Although not too sure I’ll take part this year. I’ve still TSK – The Beginning to finish, without starting the next, lol 

 

Catch you soon. Hope you have a wonderful week. 

 

Dawn