18/09/07

 

If I could turn back the clock to last night and do it over again I would have.
I made such a mess of everything, meaning myself.

I done something I don’t normally do and freaked out big time. I went to you tube and watched some bad videos, which are ok if you can handle them but I guess I just couldn’t.

I ended up self harming last night, not badly but the thing is I did it, and I had no idea that I was going to.

I think everything is just getting to me so much, I am going to have a break, I need one.

So please if you don’t see me around much I am sorry and I want you to know. Nex, neo, Martin Chris, and Stewart, that over the last few weeks you have helped me so much… and I really mean that from the bottom of my heart.

I think I just need to get this fight sorted in my head, and try and move forward again.

This isn’t a blog to get any attention for what I did, but it’s to try and help me focus on the things I need to do.

I need to start eating more, and start to think about more positive things…

I need to kick my own ass and stop letting this illness rule my head.

Thank you everyone for being there. Your words of encouragement are amazing and I think about you a lot. Hope everyone is ok, and maybe I will get to speak soon, but for now, I can’t, and I am sorry for that…

Take care. Dawn xxxxx

 

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