Friday, broken wing and editing :)

Hey guys/gals 

 

I’ve been having a tough few weeks that’s for sure, but some things are improving. Getting slight better movement in my arm. Still taking pain killers and they kind of numb the head, but it’s been 3 full weeks now since the incident. I do feel like I’m improving now. So hopeful 🙂

Anyway, I wanted to let you in on my novel’s first page. 

Over the last few months, I’ve been working very, very hard with EJ Runyon. She’s been so valuable as a coach and editor. I’ve found prose writing totally different than scripts. Where a script is so terse prose is enriched and alive. I’ve had a brilliant few months, it’s been one heck of a learning experience. And EJ will be my coach/editor for a long time. When you find someone who is good, you don’t let them go. Her way of explaining things is spot on, I’ve never had that, from English Teachers or professional I’ve wanted to hire before. (I know I’m not the easiest client, I’ve bad habits like the best of of us, but I’m trying…) 

Her blog is at – http://ejrunyon.wordpress.com/2013/06/24/structuring-sentences-to-use-more-showing/

and her coaching website is over at -http://bridgetostory.com

 

Please contact her if you’ve ever considered editing or coaching, as an author you’ll not regret it. : ) promise. 

 

And here is the first page of my novel. Un-edited. And edited, (but not final) still needs proofing and checking 100%. 

I wanted you to all see the difference a few months makes. The writing journey. This has had a good few crits over at the OWWSFF. website address is – http://sff.onlinewritingworkshop.com/index.shtml

My story attracted an Editors Choice review (middle edit) which was wonderful. And gave me total hope for the series. The reviews there really helped shape the story too.

Then I had the honour of winning a years membership over at http://www.scribophile.com which again has been one of the best sites I’ve ever come across. And helped take my novel to the next level. I also met a fantastic writer who has helped me to know end. I have no doubts I’ll be promoting his book here one day soon too. 🙂 so watch this space. 

So here it is… 

The Secret King – The Beginning 

 

From this….. 

 

Kendro eased himself into his favorite chair. It creaked just as it always did and he wished he could take it with him. His office, empty, didn’t resemble home anymore. Sadness washed over him. It was over and they had to leave everything but their prized possessions behind.

   The handmade wooden desk before him had been in his family for generations and he ran his hand along its surface until he found a tiny dent. He frowned and remembered the day he’d made that hole. The day Admiral Broki confirmed the fate of their Sun and he’d dropped a hot steaming mug of tea over everything. Now apart from the desk and set of chairs nothing else cluttered the room. All his belongings had been moved to the mother- ship. The furniture here deemed unimportant. Although why he’d deemed it unimportant shook him. These objects were a part of his history.

Resting his head in his arms, he closed his eyes just for a brief moment of thought. Were they going to survive the incredible journey ahead?

To this – 

CHAPTER ONE – Evacuation

Kendro moved nearer his office window, once again watching their dying sun, setting for the night. Too tired even to think — three days too tired. Rubbing his eyes, he stroked down the sides of his temple, a blue tingle of energy from his fingers lit his royal birthmark in a glorious rainbow of colours.

Three tiers up in the royal palace, he glanced down at the view below him, just making out the soldiers as they loaded his belongings onto shuttles in the growing twilight. The sight added a depression that weighted his soul. He turned, regarding his empty office, stripped of everything but the desk and its chair. Best to do what work I can before they come for these too.

Work didn’t come for him. He stared at the portable screen, blank. “You think you’ve won.” with a headshake, wiping away tears with the back of his hand, Kendro flung his keyboard into a corner where it shattered. “Never!”

Resting his head, Kendro rested for a brief moment. His breathing slowed, he shook himself awake. For almost three days now; with barely any sleep since he ordered the evacuation; within every tightening muscle and sinew, Kendro felt the strain.

“Kendro?”

His attention turned to his wife, Mika. Her face sparkled as she stepped lightly over the wreckage of the smashed keyboard reaching his side; a look of anxiety quickened her stride.

 

———————–

 

Different, yes, better. I totally believe so 🙂 

 

So, if you’re looking for someone to help push you that bit further, check out all of the above 🙂 You will not be disappointed. 

 

Dawn x 

Crazy week!

 

So sorry I haven’t updated much this week. It’s been very busy.

Went back to work, which was tough. The knee sort of holding up, hurts more in the afternoon than the morning after I’ve been driving all day on it.

Wed….

Had to come home from work, and then we were straight out to pick our new family friend up. A collegue of my hubby’s just got himself an African Grey and the poor ringneck he bought last year was being left in his cage, so he offered him to us.

I’ve never owned a bird before, so this experience is totally new for me. I was kinda scared of them in college, because they flew about. But, seeing them be social brought me around.

I am guessing these next few weeks will be more posts about Bobby… as well as my writing and my fish. lol…

Thurs…

Our 15th wedding anniversary. Paul and I got together in June 1996 nearly 17 years of ups and downs. Mostly ups though 🙂

I also had a session with E.J which went very well, the more sessions I have the more I learn about story telling in a prose setting. Where as I am used to doing it in a script writing sense. This is all new to me, as is learning about ‘modifers’ present or past participles. Etc etc…

Friday…

Pauls’ 53rd birthday, he had to go to work but we managed to celebrate later on.

Sat,

We managed to relax a bit. Clean the ponds, check on all the fish. I actually took a few scrapes and some from the sides of the ponds to see what other creatures we have living in them. It was a pretty interesting afternoon, researching what those critters were.

Sun,

We won a new cage for Bobby off Ebay so we went to pick it up from Skipton. It’s a much bigger cage, and we’re still settling him in, so it might be a while before we actually get to put him in it.

All tiny steps. One day at a time. After all it took me months to get my koi to hand feed and to be comfortable with me almost stroking them and picking them up out of the water, so I can only imagine how long it will take for us to get Bobby used to being around us.

Hope this week is a little easier on us. 🙂

Catch you soon.

Dawn x x

Wed tagging on Thurs :)

Ummm don’t know what happened there… I thought I posted it live. Guess I didn’t. Oops…

Wed….

I sometimes just don’t know where the time goes. This weeks flying by…. eeek.

Problems this morning with my script registrations. So had to sort that out. Funny isn’t it that almost 12 mths ago and they’ve lost my card payment details. Good job Paypal is so organised.

Work, work, work. And it’s been so busy… Can’t wait for next week when we get four days off for Easter 🙂 Yippie… I’ll get some time to catch up on things before the end of the month.

I’ve done as much editing as I can. Almost to the end of Chap 5 now. 🙂 It’s really bad when you’ve taken some time off from the piece and only been concentrating on the beginning. When you actually do move forward, you are thrown back into the world you created with a new vision. It’s brilliant. Thank you E.J. Runyon 🙂

Just been out for a small drink with the other half. Time to relax and a chippy tea… (sod the weight thing… lol.

 

——————————-

 

Thurs

 

What a storming day I’ve had at work. Settling in now. Need to crack on with Chap 5.

 

Catch you soon.

Dawn x x

Tough week!

Wow. This week has just flown by. 

I can’t really sort of catch up so this is a sort of a quick one. 

Koi…..

 

Panicked a little over the older ones acting up. But all seems much better, plenty of fresh water going in. They seem to have perked right up. Still planning on catching the sanke to see how he’s doing underneath. Although looks like swelling and scales have gone down so I’m positive. 

 

Babies all good 🙂 although a little colder than I wanted. No sulking no signs of anything after their ‘boiling ordeal’… 

 

Mortgage and the house. 

 

Well it is a shame, but there isn’t anything we can do at this moment in time. So we’ll have to wait and see what happens when the fixed term ends and see what the mortgage company say. Top and bottom of it is, if we start over paying then what we owe will come down. So, we’ll start there. 🙂 at least we have a plan. 

 

Writing 

 

Best Friends Ep 5 is being filmed. Some parts actually in L.A which is fab 🙂 and The Chronicles of Pandora has really taken a spurt on too. I’m so excited by both these projects. 

 

The Secret King – The Beginning is moving forward once more. I’ve learnt so much with my sessions with E.J that I now need to focus on and actually do the work now. On my own, with just the editing and the kick ass part of the process. I’m excited because we have a battle plan and I’m looking forward to getting this novel to the absolute best it can be. I don’t like to rush anything and it might take me a while longer but I’m still aiming for this year. 🙂 

So much to do, so little time. But I’m loving ever minute. Although I can’t shake this cold crap. 4 weeks now. I feel much better with how things are going. Some knowing and being able to plan things is better than nothing at all. It is the not knowing that kills me. 

I will speak to you soon. 🙂  Thank for stopping in. 

 

 

 

Sat is cleaning day :)

I’ve spent most of the day, cleaning, tidying up and routing out all the stuff I need for Wed. All set 🙂 

Now, I am pretty tired so I think it is time for a kip as we’re off out tonight for a friends birthday dinner. Something nice for us to do as a couple for a change. 

 

Tomorrow, I am going to do nothing but read and edit. I have a few crits that I owe out.. this might take me a while 🙂 

 

Busy, busy, but I won’t let anything spoil the next few weeks. 

 

🙂 Have a wonderful sat evening all, and I’ll report more tomorrow, maybe even post a few pictures.

 

D x x