So could life be getting any easier, I think not? Wow, have I been in for a shite ride.

First after hurting my leg, I had an amazing two weeks off, chilled out and did some great writing, managed to write my first feature length film, yey. And I loved every minute of it. I fell in love with the characters and the world I had created, and when I had finished the script, I felt like I had lost my best friend.
Its weird I know, but it actually hurt.

Anyways, I have since learned that our caravan has to be moved and that means the whole of our beautiful garden has to come up. We aren’t sure what plot of land we will end up with, who our neighbours will be and more importantly how much compensation we will get.

The next knock down, is the company I work for made an announcement this morning that they have sold us out, to someone else, I am gutted, and I thought it was quiet but it always is in Jan and Feb, but they seemed to think that was the best option for them…. What the hell is going on in my life, I just don’t know what to think or where to turn toooooo…

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I feel so useless, yes they said our jobs are safe but who can say that?

I just don’t know what to think, today is the first time I have made myself sick in a while, and I feel completely worthless. Ed always finds the worst situations to try and win you back and so I did. I turned back like the stupid woman I am, and now I feel so much worse, I also restricted badly today and then it made me worse as when I did eat, I just didn’t want it inside me.

Why is it that I feel so crap? Because life has just been sooo shit, I don’t know what I did in a past life but it really must have been bad. What could I have possibly done?

I know I am rambling on, but I am still in pain with my hand and my ankle is swollen still too, everything has gone wrong, and what next will it be.

Sorry for such a negative post here, I just can’t say anything else.

Love to ya all

Dawn
xxx

Hello everyone

Sorry if this is the wrong place to post.

So could life be getting any easier, I think not. Wow, have I been in for a shite ride.

First after hurting my leg, I had an amzing two weeks off, chilled out and did some great writing, managed to write my first feature length film, yey. And I loved every minute of it. I fell in love with the characters and the world I had created, and when I had finished the script, I felt like I had lost my best friend.
Its weird I know, but it actually hurt.

Anyways, I have since learned that our caravan has to be moved and that means the whole of our beautiful garden has to come up. We arent sure what plot of land we will end up with, who our neighbours will be and more importantly how much compensation we will get.

The next knock down, is the company I work for made an announcment this morning, that they have sold us out, to someone else, I am gutted, I thought it was quiet but it always is in jan and feb, but they seemed to think that was the best option for them…. What the hell is going on in my life, I just dont know what to think or where to turn toooooo…

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I feel so useless, yes they said our jobs are safe but who can say that?

I just dont know what to think, today is the first time I have made myself sick in a while, and i feel completely worthless. ed always finds the worst situations to try and win you back and so I did. I turned back like the stupid woman I am, and now I feel so much worse, I also restricted badly today and then it made me worse as when I did eat, I just didnt want it inside me.

Why is it that I feel so crap. Because life has just been soooo shit, I dont know what i did in a past life but it really must have been bad. What could I have possibly done?

I know I am rambling on, but I am still in pain with my hand and my ankle is swollen still too, everything has gone wrong, what next will it be.

Sorry for such a negative post here, I just cant say anything else.

Love to ya all

Dawn

Hey everyone…

I wanted to say if bad luck upsets you please don’t read this…

Two weeks ago I fell on Monday at work, at 430, I work with cardboard, and have to stand on a small platform, of which I lost my footing on, and slipped off, I caught my left middle finger on my desk and twisted it right back, with a nasty crack. Yes it hurt, and I am un a lot of pain, so I go see the first aider who just laughs and tells me to run it under the cold tap. I did, but the pain was awful. When my manager comes out of a meeting I tell him and he laughs along with the supervisor. I know it was a stupid accident but it hurt.

My step dad takes me home, so I don’t have to drive anyway, and I take some mega painkillers, it doesnt help, so off I trot to hospital. They x-ray it and they think I have a fracture, but don’t plaster it. Until I see the specialist they won’t say anything but I can’t work.

I go to work as I am desperate for the money, and my boss is nice enough to give me real light duties to do.

I am in a lot of pain, but ok, I manage…

On Thursday I go to the fracture clinic and they confirm it’s a spiral fracture on my fifth metacarpal. I have it plastered up.

I manage to work Friday and all last week with it in plaster, I am miserable… and Ed is trying to rule my head. Saying all the regular nasty things to me…

On Thursday with the bad winds I can’t get home so my step dad takes me to his house and I stay there I don’t see my husband Paul and I am sad as I love him dearly. On the Friday morning, I am upset and I cry to him on the phone, I have been feeling bad for ages, and I agree to go back to the doctor and go back on my medication, (anti depressants) Then he tells me he is going out for his mates birthday and I am not invited.. I cried, all I wanted was a bit of support some love, but oh no he went out…

So sat at home on me own, having some wine, I get a text of my polish girlfriend Monika who was staying up the road from me that night, she is bored, and so I say lets go out then. So at ten I met her in the local pub and we dance and have a drink. I drink diet coke for heavens sake.

Hubby hasn’t taken his phone with him so I text his friend to say I went out.

On the way back from the pub we stop for Monika’s supper, and head for her flat. There I fall down a pot hole, hurting my ankle. I eventually get up after cursing loudly and struggle up her stairs where I can survey the damage, and. I have cut my fourth finger, and my right knee, my ankle is massive and now I carnet get home. I call a taxi and its going to be an hour. So I walk home.

Hubby aint there, he didn’t get the train, I am so annoyed, and I knew he would miss it, so I ring his friend. He was getting a lift home, so I wait for him.

I don’t say anything to him, I don’t have to. I get my mum to take me to hospital, thankfully it’s not broken. But it hurts more than my hand…

I went to the docs yesterday and I got my anti dep back, and took some, but I can’t take the painkillers and them together, I was so ill yesterday, so they will have to wait, I can manage for a bit longer without them…

I just wanted to let it out, I guess how frustrated I am with everything. How hurt I am and I am feeling so so sorry for myself.

I will heal I know, but its not good right now. Really not good….

Love Dawn.

hey just to let you know, i broke my hand and cant type much, hope you are all well, missing you all.

take care Dawn…xxx

ps it hurts…xx

I am soooooo in pain.

Hope everyone is ok; I haven’t got my computer sorted yet at my nanas hope to this week miss coming here.

Love to you all…

Dawn
xxxxxxxxx