I can’t stress how much the weeks are flying past now that I am back in work. So this one might be a long one…. sorry. And also a double poster.

Week starting with the 10th

I kind of got off to a bad start with this one. For those who don’t want to read about womanly ‘things’ then look away, this one isn’t for you.

I’ve been married for 16 years this April. And due to my Eating Disorder in the very beginning my periods were all waco. So I went onto something that, at the time would sort them and me out. The Deprovera injection. At first this was really not a great thing. Supposed to sort it out, it vastly made things worse. And I bled for the first 3 mths almost non stop. As a weak person from the Ed, it did make me worse. However, it did settle.

Dec 2012 and the nurse told me how much my weight was affecting blood pressure and she was thinking that coming off the injection was a good idea, to help with the weight side of things. I came off it, it has taken me almost 15 months to regain that monthly womanly thing. (I so don’t need it in my job) but it started off on the Monday and lasted till Friday.

I guess you can call me a monster, as I had weird mood shifts, terrible pains, and the yukky side of it was just something I can’t be doing with, my decision is to go back on the injection. For my health and sanity.

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This affected my weigh in also. There was no weight loss. Water gain, was big, muscle a point and so was bone density. This then deflated me into paranoid and Ed behavioural thinking. If it wasn’t for the people around me being as supportive as they were, then I am afraid I might have started to do stupid things. My brain was screaming at me that I’ve been eating too much and at the weekend I drank myself silly just to drown out the voices for a while.

This really didn’t help me, kinda makes things worse.

Dawn