Tag Archives: Life

Apr 15 2013

Docs again…

I had to go back to the docs today. Because my knee just isn’t getting too much better. I did a little on it yesterday and there was so much pain last night. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t get comfortable. : ( 

The doc signed me off till the 22nd. Although I could do without ‘no cash’ we’ll cope. However I’m concerned still at present for when I do go back. 

Had no concentration the last couple of days. Can’t even watch the TV. Just feel all weirded out. Which for me isn’t nice. Could be the meds. I don’t know. I’m exhausted too. 

So a break it really is. More TV and rest. 

We’ve still got some problems with Paul’s car, so it looks like we’ll have to put the bike on the road fix this up and move it on. He hates it already which isn’t good. 

Koi are loving this warmer weather 🙂 Shame I can’t do much with them, bar feed em. lol

Watched a nice film last night. Will see what we can pick out tonight. 🙂 

 

Speak soon. 

 

D x x 

Dec 31 2012

Goodbye 2012

helllooooo 2013…

I am not going to be sad to see this year disappear into the dust.

It has been one of the hardest years of my life, in terms of work, (both for myself and Paul) my home life (a result of work) and my koi. 😦

Too many ups and downs for my liking and I can only hope that this next year has a more positive and happy outcome.

I can say that 2012, has been more positive for my writing. That has taken a much better turn. So I have one thing I am pleased about.

Best Friends, Irobe and working on my Sci Fi TV series and novel for The Secret King.

So, without any hesitation I bid 2012 goodbye. See you on the other side. 🙂

May you all have a wonderful evening with family or friends, stay safe and enjoy.

Dawn x x

Nov 28 2012

Writing over stress

So, yeah I managed to get the 50k done, and I am glad that I had nano to focus on.

 

Been a very stressful weekend to be honest and few days to be honest. And I didn’t blog about it before, in case well you know. Employers spy on everything nowadays. My other half was suspended on friday  from work, pending an investigation into ticket irregularities.

 

To cut a long story short, he’s a bus driver and he takes kids to and from school. He’s been in the job for 16 years and has never had a bad thing happen to him. Till Friday, when he had some inspectors on.

 

Kids are kids and they love to bunk on… but they don’t realize that without a ticket and then  them lying to the  ticket inspector saying they paid the driver, that they can get the driver into lots of trouble and of course the driver could lose his job.

 

Well it was very stressful, it wasn’t his fault, but thankfully at present he still has his job.

 

Nanowriomo has helped me deal with this over the weekend. Instead of driving me up the wall, I’ve focused on the story, wrote a lot and kept myself sane.

 

So a big thank you.

 

I am in the process of calming down. We’re okay, we will be okay. It has just been very, very hard.

 

I’ve managed to write some more today, I do want to finish this novel. 🙂 So onwards. I’ll keep you posted.

 

D x

Oct 20 2012

A mixed week thoughts and feelings :(

So, yeah it has been a pretty mixed week.

Quite simple really, its been tough. Very tough. Work has been hard, hard to get through each day.

I hate that the nurse tells me things I already know. Blood pressure is still up. If it continues then I may have to go on tablets etc etc. My weight is a big issue with her, because I know I am a big girl. I don’t hide from it. But what would she sooner me be, eating, or not eating? No brainer really. My body is, as it is.

But there is a decision to make, between being ill in ‘one sense’ and then being ill in another.

I have had a good week ‘food wise’ stuck to what I wanted to eat and didn’t let the work side of things get to me so that I over did it. I have been quite shocked in the fact that a pair of wellies didn’t fit me over the weekend and now that they do. I don’t like drastic weight loss, it fuels the Eating Disorder behaviors that are so stuck in my head. Those behaviors which I fight so hard to ignore every single time I am confronted with food.
I wish Recovery was so simple, you get over it. But in my mind, you don’t. There is this thing that has been deep seated inside your brain for, well for me 17 years. 4 years in recovery just still doesn’t quite cut it.

The good thing is I know. I know all the tricks that ED tries. Believe me he sticks that knife in where ever and with what ever I do.

I still have the confidence and the drive to fight, and I won’t go backwards. It just really is a struggle sometimes.

I am glad that I can still say that, I am glad even though I am doing well with my writing and my personal stuff, that I don’t feel the need to change.

People will love me, or hate me.  But, I don’t lie, and I won’t. Ed did that enough for me in those 17 years.

——————————
General life…

I’ve had some big issues with my Koi this week, and they’ve not got easier. One particularly sick fish is really struggling. But, I’ve had a good friend come out to help out today, and I’ve decided on a course of action. It still is touch and go. Costia is the worst thing I’ve ever encountered.

But it isn’t over yet. She hasn’t given up just yet, and neither will I.

Will let you know how we get on tomorrow. A sharp PP bath, and into my QT tank with my baby fish she will go.  Fingers crossed.

——–

Writing,

I have had a very pleasant week. Best Friends going live on you tube,  has been the light keeping me totally on track. I’ve had the nervousness, I’ve had the excitement and its been the best week of my life in that regard.

I can only hope that it continues to hit home and that people can relate to the girls situations and to the relationship they have with each other.

So keep watching, and keep us in your thoughts through this next week. On every level, I need positive vibes.

Speak soon.

D x